I am gonna belabor the point. I don’t want to put this in
absolute terms, but you should, if at all possible, be working with a group of
magi. In my experience, there is little else that will improve your practice as
much as learning from your peers.
Don’t tell me you can’t find other people who are interested
in magick. You have the internet. I assume most of you have friends, and you’ll
be surprised how easy it is to get them into it. Don’t tell me you don’t have
the time. Make it a priority. Don’t tell me you are too surly, introverted,
weird, or just anti-social. You’re a godsdamn magician! You can do anything.
There are a few rare exceptions. People in extreme poverty,
people living under tyranny (that can be social tyranny, like abusive SOs and
family), and people with disabilities. Don’t get me started on magical groups
who don’t provide for people with disabilities, that’s another topic. But if
you don’t fit in one of those categories, find the others! Get your ass in a
car or on a bus and do magick with others.
I drive from Indianapolis to Kansas City twice per year
(2,000 miles). Indianapolis to Rockford, IL, at least three times per year
(1,800 miles). Indianapolis to Bedford, IN once per year (200 miles).
Indianapolis to Cincinnati (200 miles). That’s over 4,000 miles a year, with my
old ass crashing on air mattresses and eating Cliff Bars to make it work. Some
of it involves camping, and I hate fucking camping. But it’s worth it for those
precious days where I can do magick with the people I love.
It will be work. There will be drama. There will be people
you don’t like. There will be logistical nightmares. I know you are thinking
right now that there is no way you can do it. Try it. Just once. Go to a pagan
festival that has rituals. Throw a party for your friends where each of you
bring a ritual to perform. Once you do, you will thank me.
What does this have to do with ancestors? Not to be a
bummer, but if you are a part of a magical tribe long enough, one of those
people are gonna die.
I started writing this post wanting to describe those
amazing people. I have already written about Mordecai Sova, and probably said
more than I should. She was a very private person. But that event changed me in
so many ways it’s hard for me to even talk about magick anymore without talking
about her.
Let’s instead talk about Dr. D. He’s probably a more
interesting case in some respects, because I never actually met Dr. D. The Doctor committed suicide shortly after I joined the IOT and met my current magical
family. He’s interesting for a whole lotta reasons. One, he’s now become a
legendary figure. His veneration is now generational. Everyone who joins our
tribe learns Dr. D’s stories. In my working theory of EMAN, that means he’s now
an “elevated” spirit. If a spirit becomes the subject of veneration by people
outside their direct blood-kin, and those people pass on the stories of that
spirit, they are on their way to godhood. At least that’s what a lot of anthropologists
believe, as we have evidence of multiple people who were once kings, local
culture heroes, and important magi later being turned into gods. Or something
like a god. Note that in Voudon the lwa are not actually gods specifically
because it is believed they were once humans, at least some of them. It’s
complicated and differs depending on lineage.
I absolutely do believe that veneration in this world
bolsters a spirit’s cred in the afterlife. That means they have more allies and
more influence in the spirit world. I can also say from personal experience
that when a magus crosses over, they take with them many tools for crossing
spiritual boundaries. That makes contacting them all the more easy and gives them
more options for influencing the physical world.
The second interesting thing about the good Doctor is that
he is venerated by multiple traditions. I can’t speak personally for any member
of the IOT as far as direct veneration goes, but he is certainly honored by
that organization. My physical link to Dr. D comes from that bottle of whiskey
you see pictured above. That’s something the Doctor and I share, a love of fine
whiskey. That particular bottle was used in an IOT ritual honoring him after
his death. (Oops, there I go breaking oaths again.) He is directly venerated,
and is considered a Saint of Emergent Magick, specifically by my tribe, Reynahschar.
He was also initiated into a Palo Mayombe lineage. I have never been initiated
into Palo, and would never claim to be a Palo practitioner, but my tribe, in a
very real sense can now claim a Palo lineage through Dr. D.
The last, most interesting bit, is complicated. I don’t
think anyone can say for certain why another human being takes their own life.
Was it mental illness? Did Dr. D become a victim of his own hubris and fail to
protect himself adequately from the negative spiritual forces that many magi
truck with? Or was it his last great magical experiment? Probably some
combination of all of that and more. I do have in good confidence that Dr. D
wanted to be a spiritual ambassador after he died. He wanted to be contacted
after he passed over, and he wanted magi to remember him.
I don’t know if that makes it any better. Many people were
deeply hurt by his actions and feel resentment. I can’t blame them. I don’t
know if he was in so much pain that it really was a valid option. It’s too big.
I know not having met him personally colors my viewpoint, but in a moral sense,
I just can’t judge what he did one way or the other. What do you say about a
man willing to take the ultimate leap in the service of his craft? I just don’t
know.
I know that right now, suicide is not an option for me. I
have way too many things to prepare before my death. Just wait, there will be
multiple posts on that project. Of course, I could be a fool and I could drop
dead tomorrow. But I do believe one of the ultimate goals of any magus is
preparing for their own death. What goals do you have in the spirit world? Who
will join you in that quest?